Sometimes we love people unconditionally but after sometime we feel it might not come back the same way. We lose our patience in the way and try things that would impress the other person, we try to hide our vulnerabilities, we try to cover everything that other person might not like in us. But would that be considered as love? If you show the employees the cafetaria, the pool, the gym and the golf club in your company and hire them, while hiding the 99 floored stacks of files to work on, would your employees still love your company? And did you attract them the right way first of all? NO.
Sometimes people don’t have patience, they feel lonely, we all do at some point of our life, being at this point we get a person that cares for us, looks after us, is available at hard times, (is of opposite gender), then you might feel those bells, you feel loved. Sure it’s a beautiful thing, but often it turns ugly.
There are 5 main things that you can consider before letting it get ugly.
1. If you love someone set them free – If it comes back to you, embrace it, if it doesn’t – love from a distance. You cannot force someone to love you. You may end up trying hard and failing hard.
2. You are not superior or inferior – If you think you need to hear everything your love says, or your love should behave the way you say, out of some presumed compulsion in your bond, then keep out. You both should share an equal level for each other, no one should feel inferior or superior to anyone.
3. It takes time – What would happen if you don’t propose at the right time or didn’t make the right moves or didn’t express your feelings that you already had but you decided to wait for the right time? In this period of patience what if someone else comes in mid way and does all the things instantly and gets together with your love? You would be disappointed a lot isn’t it? Yes you would, anyone would. But really, your loss is nothing in front of the one who just lost you. Not everything you lose is a loss, wrong pieces can never complete the puzzle. Feel good that you atleast figured out that piece & your peace as well.
4. Can you love safe? – How do you invest your money? Do you invest all you have or give it few tries until you come to know you are getting something good in return too? Let’s forget about the profit here, love is not about giving 5 and getting 10, it’s about giving it all, but giving it all to the wrong person will only empty you. So how will you come to know? “After getting empty!” Would be the right answer in most cases, there is of course no method or formula or a fool proof way to love, there is a very beautiful quote on love though – “Love is giving someone the power to destroy you but trusting them not to.” Aesthetically, the essence of love lies in these mystical ways of unfolding, the risks you take, the hopes you create, the prayers you say. That innocence, that sweetness may never come from a step by step guide. But often some people have had it enough and had quite ugly experiences and can’t have more, for them this would be preferable – To see if its a two way traffic! You need to be strong here, you need to be ready to accept the reality and be ready to make the move positively when you don’t see it from other side.
5. Don’t lose your spark – Someone likes you or loves you because they can see something in you, they can see it because you already are something. Love changes people, agreed but keep your identity alive, be lovable in your own way, share your love in your own way.. We make the other person our whole world, that’s beautiful if the other does too, but still, being independent, being free, gives you more character, builds more traits in you, helps you establish your personality, brings out more abilities from you, you grow more, you see more, you do more, and while having such freedom and independence when you also have a hand to hold, then you can go places! The best things in life are wild and free, so don’t you want to be the best for your love? 😉